Death when you’re young is one of the hardest things to understand. People close to you use too many words to explain it and people you don’t know very well choke on their words while saying something along the lines of, “they’re in a better place”.
Everything is simple before you understand it. No one can really explain death to you because there’s no way to explain the pain that follows, and that’s okay, because we understand it when we feel it.
I was 9 when my great grandmother passed away. This is the young I mean. I’m growing, I’m learning, I’m still overly honest. I remember being sad. I remember seeing everyone else sad, smiling through quivering chins. I remember wondering how we will visit her if she isn’t there. It takes time for these things to kick in when you’re 9. I was left with so many memories, and a lot of them weren’t even mine. Some were stories and jokes told by my mother, my aunt, my cousin. They’ve been told to me so many times that they’ve become my own, and I even find myself smiling while thinking of them as if I were there for every second.
Every one of those memories involves gathering around a table of food. Whether it was in the afternoon, evening, outside, inside, for 5 minutes or for 5 hours, we sat and shared stories while filling our plates. There’s so much more to a meal than the food. It’s an excuse to gather, a glue that keeps people talking and laughing.
While all of my favorite snacks became my favorite when I was young, whether it has to do with a memory attached or just the taste, it's fun to reinvent them with what I have on hand today. These salmon toasts are basically all of my favorite things in one bite. Really tasty foods can be as simple as this, it's just about the quality of the ingredients you use. Some homemade sourdough, boursin, and fresh smoked salmon are a dream team. Plus smoked salmon will forever remind me of my great grandmother and those late mornings in her dining room, and that memory is mine.
make em ~
Pretty self explanatory- Lightly toast or grill the sourdough, top with the cream cheese or boursin, then however you'd like!
what you need ~
- thick cut sourdough
- red onion
- smoked salmon
- cream cheese or boursin
- fresh chives